When I first entered into the business of art licensing, I found it very difficult to claim ownership of my creative expression (my work). I resisted seeking external validation yet, I yearned for it - but I still resisted seeking it. Sometimes, it felt like a daily challenge to process the conundrum and I found it was often a painful place occupying my heart & soul.
Because validation for my being was not forthcoming from the adults in my life when I was a little girl, I suppose I grew up with the belief that needing it reflected some level of weakness or neediness. This is such a false belief. We are created to seek and to receive validation. What I needed to learn is that while it's okay to seek and receive - and give - warm fuzzies along the path of life, we all will fall short at one point or another in giving, and receiving. I even tell my daughters, "Ya know, I'm gonna fail you. I don't want to. I won't do so intentionally, but there will be times that I will simply fall short of what you need."
This is because I am human, and I am fallible. The shortcoming is not a reflection of them, but of my humanity. The wonderful news is, we each have one true source, a well that is deep with the purest nourishment for our validation - our Creator. No matter how many times we draw from the well, there is more of what we need.
Social media is an odd little well, that millions of us have dropped our validation bucket into. We look, we see, we perceive, we validate, we don't validate - but, when we put it all into its proper perspective we can become friends with it, and it with us, understanding and accepting it is simply a tool to connect us - not to validate us.
I was recently introduced to Kristen Noelle's Trust Tending blog, and love it! She shares a fun, genuine approachable perspective to and practice with social media when you sign up to receive her posts. I recommend you take a peek in on her.
A commercial creative business is so much about validation: acceptance of the art we create, the contract, the big (well received) product offering, ensuing sales, features and feedback. It's all something we need & that's okay. In my heart & soul, I know that I’m good at what I do, and that there's a lot more to my story than meets the eye. I work hard and deliver results, but that knowledge and that feeling of capability is internal. Without external validation there’s no feedback, and everything I do exists in a vacuum.
It becomes a problem, of course, when we start seeking out that external validation as the only means of feeling good about ourself. I recently shared with this sweet new friend that this is precisely why I see my Creator as my one true source from which I can venture out and share with all of you, then return to Him for strengh, sustenance, nourishment and the filling up of my validation bucket. Then, swing out far and wide again to hopefully help fill your validation bucket with what I create, what I write and how I connect with you and you with me. The good news is that you too have your own bucket and your own well from which to draw any time and as much as your heart & soul desire.
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